“about what?....” some might ask – “What on earth could be exciting about Another, maybe average or mundane looking, day in the depths of a Scottish Winter in January?”
That is completely immaterial as it isn’t actually true – there is NOTHING mundane about Any moment. I experience such Magic in the seemingly mundane. Every moment is Divine and contains nothing but perfection (WHATEVER the mind may offer or suggest).
I am excited by the complete and utter stillness that is always there as the background context no matter what movement occurs. Stillness and silence are the only constants. I am Very excited about my relationship with the Experience of the silence - not the theory or the discussion or description but the Experience. From there, everything else emerges.
I am excited about the complete impermanent, confusing, mysterious adventure that this entire life is and showing up fresh and innocent over and over as I can reset and bring myself back to the moment .
I am excited that I have absolutely No clue whatsoever what will happen in the next minute – no clue at all. It unfolds without me doing a thing and I laugh at any illusion that I have control. I haven’t a clue what I will say or think or even type and I have Absolutely No clue what Anyone else might say or do. (I laugh as a memory pops up of how I used to play out imaginary conversations and what I would say to someone and then I’d meet them and it would be So different!)
I am finally excited about Being on this rock and Being IN this body that I resisted living in for so long. It was too painful and uncomfortable to really be in body and I turned from it and numbed out but I have No resistance right now. All my suffering came from the illusion of separation and I don’t experience that right now.
I am excited that I can rest in the moment and feel the alive presence of the majestic wonder, without having to change a single thing. I Don’t have to change my bank account, or my weight/ size or anything about my relationships or my job or anything whatsoever. I don’t need to beat myself up for Anything I have said or done. I don’t need to try or fix or judge. I don’t need to push all the shadow away and pretend it isn’t moving through and numb out and avoid it. Just Allowing the totality in a Very alive somatic experience. Without changing, transforming, or healing any of it –giving space and safe passage and sanctuary for all the unwanted, unseen, unexpressed shadows. and I’m Utterly OK with everything, Ridiculously, Contently so. We are unlimited beings and we can’t box in out limited concepts of how it Should look or feel.
I am excited that Everything is perfectly designed Exactly as it is, no matter if I may have a preference for something other, what IS Right Now could not be more perfect. Nothing is broken, nothing needs fixed, there is Nothing to DO except Rest in this Delicious Moment and allow whatever to emerge from there.
I am excited to notice the lack of violence in not trying to do something or to change something.
I am excited about the exquisite aliveness of life that is coursing through my body in waves right Now. I notice it traveling through my vessels and muscles and bones and empty places like riding a water slide with squealing joy and the joy at embracing the terror as well. Yes there are a so very many places of tension and tightness and stuckness and all of it is ok. It is such a miracle to have a body and each time I stop and watch it, I trip out my head at the spine tingling complexities of cells dying and new ones forming and neurons firing and muscles moving and All of it. If you can watch your own miracle and not trip of your face, you are doing better than me – I get Lost in the magic of the body and feel Such love for every atom.
I am excited by the intense miraculous beauty of the world, that takes my breath away in gasps of delight as life plays back and offers me more and more to see and notice and find heartbreaking joy in.
I am very excited about my relationship with the experience of the Beloved and how it humbles me and takes me to my knees in reverence and devotion that can’t be expressed in words.
I am excited about the constant lessons and teachings and learning’s over and over and over, the constant falling and failing and discovering.
I am excited about the shedding as old limiting patterns are discovered, acknowledged and let go of.
I am excited about the dissolve as Everything melts and is destroyed and is let go of that the next piece is presented without Anything for me to plan and control and organise.
I am excited about all the opportunities and discoveries that are yet unknown.
I am lost in the miraculous unfolding that brings me more reasons to be grateful all the time.
I am excited that this is Only the beginning.
My Soul flies and swirls and pants in supreme giddy delight.
I am excited…