I had such an ingrained identification that had been drummed into me of what a path should be.
Identification with the feeling of a conclusion, a goal, an end point,
always just out of reach.
how long and winding it all felt.
Sometimes It felt like I was out in the mists with my lamp
stumbling along,
finding my way,
ever trusting,
not knowing if there was ground beneath the next step or not.
Sometimes there would be excitement or maybe trepidation or maybe even terror.
Sometimes it seemed like it would be nice to tuck in behind someone else and follow them for a bit and let them make all the decisions about where to go and just let them lead.
But that was never my way.
I was out there on my own -
exploring and discovering:
So many dead ends, red herrings, blind alleys…..
and all of that is so perfect.
Walking with the unknown, the unseen,
the ever growing deep trusting and
Faith -
Not in Any deity but in the Great Mystery, in She, in Myself.
The trap was this belief in a path at all.
‘Your life is your path’, as a wise person once said.
No matter how it Ever looks, the unfolding is Always perfect.
No matter how messy or seemingly chaotic or how many scrapes and tears there are.
There is no race,
no competition,
no comparison.
there is no end point,
there is no process we need to do,
there is NOTHING that we need to do.
THIS is it!
THIS,
Simply THIS.
I kept looking for this “Path” in the mists,
as I “thought” I had to do something, Become something.
Such illusions!
I Am ALREADY The Stillness, The Silence, The Source of All.
I Always was!
This “Path” has shown me that I just had a an old belief that I was separate from Everything... and I wasn’t at all.
The veils and Illusions and Mists lift and I return to the Truth of who I am.
Resting on the pathless path.
Home again.
Lokantina October 2016